


Riptide

by NamelesslyNightlock



Series: Going Down Swinging [61]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, BAMF Loki (Marvel), BAMF Tony Stark, Caught, Confused Tony Stark, Denial of Feelings, Developing Relationship, Enemies With Benefits, Feels, Fluff, Fluffy Ending, Fuckbuddies, Getting Together, Healing, Hurt Loki (Marvel), Hurt Tony Stark, Idiots in Love, Injury, Kissing, Loki (Marvel) Feels, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Non-Graphic Smut, Non-Graphic Violence, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Pining, Protective Loki (Marvel), Protective Tony Stark, Rescue, Romantic Fluff, Self-Sacrifice, Self-Sacrificing Tony Stark, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Worried Loki (Marvel), tony stark to the rescue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-05
Updated: 2020-06-05
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:26:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24554623
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NamelesslyNightlock/pseuds/NamelesslyNightlock
Summary: By the time Tony realised he was starting to fall in love, it was already far too late.
Relationships: Loki/Tony Stark
Series: Going Down Swinging [61]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1330490
Comments: 51
Kudos: 559





	Riptide

**Author's Note:**

  * For [STARSdidathing](https://archiveofourown.org/users/STARSdidathing/gifts).



> Thanks Stars for the idea of how to work my way around this prompt! ❤︎  
>   
>  **Prompt** — _“I told you not to fall in love with me.”_

It was just an arrangement. A mutual satiation of desires, a way for them both to chase their pleasure and nothing – _nothing_ – more.

Tony had known that from the start. It would have been hard not to, since Loki was very clear about what he wanted, and what he did _not._

_There’ll be no emotion or attachment involved here, Stark. You are pleasure to me, and nothing more._

Tony was more than used to being nothing more than _pleasure_ and at the time, it hadn’t hurt. Besides, Tony’s gaze had been sticking to Loki ever since their first meeting, sliding over his slim yet toned figure, the long fingers, the hair that looked perfect for gripping on to.

Oh, Tony knew what he wanted, and yeah, at the time, _attachment_ surely hadn’t been it.

_At the time._

Well, that was just the crux of the matter, wasn’t it?

See, there’s a problem with Loki.

He was one of the Avengers’ most persistent enemies, always stirring up trouble for the poor, unfortunate citizens of New York. He was callous and mercurial, quick to anger and impossibly prickly to hold a conversation with. He always felt the need to have the last word, and he folded insults together with pretty prose so easily that it made Tony’s blood boil.

And the main, overarching, pretty fucking massive problem with all of this was, of course, that Loki was absolutely _perfect_ for Tony.

He challenged him in every possible way, always kept Tony on his toes. Every moment, even when they were in bed, everything had to be a competition– and _every moment_ had Tony feeling more alive than he ever had before.

_No emotion._

_No attachment._

Tony _tried._ He knew what Loki was, of course he did, as it was part of what was drawing him in– and Tony _swore_ to himself that if he started to feel like he was getting in too deep, he would rip himself out of the situation quicker than JARVIS could say _Sir._

But, it wasn’t like he was standing on the edge of a cliff, making a choice to jump—

He was being slowly dragged out to sea in a riptide, and by the time he glanced back to shore, it was far too late.

Tony was already drowning.

The more time Tony spent with Loki, the more he _cared_ – the more he wanted to see Loki smile, the more he wanted to lay with him in bed and _cuddle,_ the more he wanted to just—

To just be _together._

But, Loki always left the bed the moment they were done.

He always fought Tony on the battlefield, no different to how he fought with anyone else.

He always looked at him with this… _blank_ expression, almost as if Tony wasn’t even a real person.

_You are pleasure to me. Nothing more._

Well, Tony supposed he’d always known that from the start.

And while he _could_ still get out– while Loki had also made it clear that the moment Tony _wanted_ him to stop, he would, Tony could never bring himself to force their arrangement to end.

It hurt, knowing that the man he’d fallen in love with saw him as little more than a warm body to stick his dick into.

But it would hurt even more to lose him entirely.

Because even though it wasn’t exactly what he wanted, Tony still _liked_ having sex with Loki, he still craved the feel of Loki’s body pressed against his own, the sound of his moans, the way that his lips always parted and his brow always pinched _just so_ right before he came. Tony adored absolutely every precious second, and he wouldn’t have exchanged it for the world.

Which was why, when he heard that SHIELD had managed to get their hands on some pretty fucking serious alien tech, when he heard that they had managed to shoot Loki down and had him locked away in a deep, dark cell—

There was only the one thing he could think of to do.

Tony didn’t pause to consult with the other Avengers– he didn’t even pause to consult with _JARVIS._ He just up and left, his suit jetting out of the tower at speeds that might have made the Lockheed Corporation jealous.

SHIELD didn’t know he was coming, and they didn’t know _why_ he was there. But as an Avenger – and the guy who’d designed their security system – they just let him right in without question.

Tony had a suspicion that Fury allowed him easy access to Loki’s cell because he wanted to be able to show off, and that might have annoyed him on any other day. But not that day.

The moment he reached the cell, he pressed his hands against the missile-proof glass, and he froze.

Loki looked like _shit._

“Stark,” Loki muttered, his dark hair falling almost lankly over his bloodied face. “Come to gloat?”

Tony just stared, for a moment, the words sending a short twinge through his chest—

But he pushed past it with ease, because that didn’t _matter._ He was more than used to living with a broken heart in _all_ possible definitions of the term, and the only thing that he needed to be focusing on was getting Loki _out._

So he turned to the door, and he raised his repulsor—

And you know what? No matter how high-tech something is, no matter how secure it’s believed to be, it’s always easy to get in if you’re the one who helped _design_ the thing.

One hit to a weak spot in the electronics and the door slid open with a hiss.

Loki was stepping toward it in moments—

But the shot had set off an alarm, and there were already agents streaming toward them from the hallway.

That was okay, that was something Tony had expected– and he knew that there was only one thing he needed to do.

He put his back to the agents, ignoring their shouts and his guns, and he turned the high-powered laser in his suit upon the chains that bound Loki’s wrists– and his seiðr.

Loki’s eyes widened.

“Stark, turn _around—”_

“Mr Stark, step away from the prisoner immediately, or we will be forced to shoot! This is your only warning!”

Tony paid neither Loki nor the soldier any notice, bar that he worked a little faster. He _needed_ to get Loki free, his own safety didn’t matter compared to that of the man he loved—

Then the crack of a gun echoed through the room, and the last thing Tony was truly, properly aware of was Loki’s sudden intake of breath.

The adamantium bullet, designed for taking down the Asgardian SHIELD held captive, slammed straight though the suit and into Tony’s back with a screech of metal and a devastating burst of agony—

Tony cried out as he lost his footing, falling forward—

But instead of landing on his face, he was caught in Loki’s arms.

“Stark, you _damned_ fool,” Loki hissed—

Then he raised one hand from Tony’s waist, and there was the sound of an explosion and agonised screams from the soldiers—

And then Tony experienced the odd, unnerving sensation of being unmade.

It was like every atom of his being was forced apart, torn from each other and then reassembled a second later—

And when Tony’s eyes pulled open, his breath coming in terrified gasps, unsure of what had happened. He could see his bedroom, but that couldn’t be right, he was in SHIELD, wasn’t he? That made no sense at all.

As he was trying to muddle it out, a sound cut sharply through the confusion.

“JARVIS, open the suit. _Now.”_

_Loki._

Tony made no complaint as JARVIS did as he was told, even though Loki was still, technically, an enemy. Honestly, in Tony’s jumbled mind, Loki was—

Well.

Loki could do anything he wanted to Tony. He was so far gone, so out of his mind with pain that he didn’t really care.

He didn’t _trust_ Loki. He wasn’t that naïve. He just… well, if Loki saw fit to leave him there to bleed out alone, then Tony probably wouldn’t hold it against him.

Tony didn’t think Loki would, though. If only because– Tony _had_ saved him, that much was obvious. And Loki might be an asshole, but he was an honourable one. He paid his debts, even when he didn’t want to.

Sure enough, the moment Tony was free of the suit, Loki took him into his arms and gently guided him toward the bed and laid him down with a tenderness that Tony hadn’t even known Loki possessed.

“You were lucky,” Loki said, his cool hands touching ever so carefully as he examined Tony’s injury. “The bullet went all the way through, it’s likely in the front of your armour. And it went through your shoulder, missing the bone. You will be fine.”

Tony wasn’t really taking any of it in, to be honest. All he knew was that it _hurt—_

And then it hurt even _more_ as Loki started doing, uh, something, Tony couldn’t see, and it was all he could do not to scream as he tried to get away, his earlier thoughts overruled by the primal instinct to avoid further pain.

“Stay _still,”_ Loki hissed. And suddenly, Tony was frozen, held in place by yet more seiðr—

And slowly, _slowly,_ the pain began to recede, until Tony couldn’t feel any at all.

The moment he was healed, Loki let him go with a gasp, falling back onto the bed at Tony’s side. Tony stayed exactly where he was, trying to hold himself together– not because there was any remaining soreness, but because he knew, of course, that Loki would be leaving soon.

He always did.

But when the seconds stretched to minutes, and Tony could still hear Loki’s laboured breaths, he turned his head against his pillow to stare.

Loki turned as well, as if he could sense Tony’s gaze, opening just the one eye to return it.

“What?” Loki asked.

Tony blinked. “You’re still here.”

He almost regretted saying it when Loki’s brow furrowed into a frown, but then Loki pushed himself up so that he was sitting cross-legged on the mattress.

Tony followed suit, though a little less gracefully, still feeling slightly wobbly after the ordeal.

Loki waited for him to be settled before speaking again.

“Why did you do it?”

Then, it was Tony’s turn to frown. “What do you mean?”

“Why did you _save_ me? You must have known that it was dangerous, you must have known that you might have been hurt. It could have been so much worse—”

“Would you rather that I had left you there?” Tony asked, confused by the growing emotion in Loki’s tone. “You know they were probably going to cut you open or something, right?”

“ _Yes,”_ Loki snapped. “Yes, I know, and yes, I _would have_. I am not worth you getting _killed.”_

The last few words escaped Loki’s lips in a broken hiss, and as Tony’s heart all but stopped, he realised that Loki probably hadn’t even realised that he’d said them.

“…What?” Tony breathed.

And then, Loki’s eyes went wide—

But he didn’t backtrack. Instead, after a few seconds of surprise, the shock bled into solid determination.

“I mean it,” Loki said. “Anthony, your life is not worth mine. You are a good person– an _incredible_ person, and you should never have taken a _bullet_ for me. I value your life far above my own.”

“Loki…” Tony drew in a breath, trying to steady himself as he tried not to let himself _hope_ too much at the sense of something more lying beneath Loki’s words. “What exactly are you saying?”

Loki’s mask faltered– only for a moment, at first, before falling entirely. He leaned forward slightly, reaching with half-trembling fingers to cup Tony’s face in a gesture far more gentle than anything he had _ever_ gifted Tony with before.

Tony felt like he couldn’t breathe, like he was caught in a too-perfect moment that would snap and shatter without warning, without cause. It was– after so long of wanting, of aching, of _yearning_ , this felt like something out of a dream, out of a wildest fantasy that would never, _could_ never be fulfilled.

Loki didn’t _do_ this.

And yet…

“I told you not to fall in love with me,” Loki said, his expression uncharacteristically vulnerable– and the reminder caused something in Tony’s chest to clench. “But I have been in love with _you_ for a very long time. I had hoped that if I had you for a short while, I would—”

“Get me out of your system?” Tony had meant the words to be at least a little sarcastic, but– they came out on a breath of hope, and Loki smiled a little in response.

“As it were,” he said. “But it would seem that you are not so easy to get rid of, Anthony Stark.”

“No,” Tony agreed, his heart pounding so very fast, his head light, his mind still not truly _believing_ that this was actually happening. “I’m really not.”

“And I’ll be forever glad of that,” Loki replied quietly. “Because by all rights, you should have left me a long time ago. I’ve always been afraid, but you—” Loki’s voice faltered, and his jaw tensed as he glanced away.

And finally…

 _Finally,_ Tony realised what that was.

It wasn’t annoyance, or frustration. Not impatience, not a desire to get away from Tony as quickly as possible.

It was _fear._

That wasn’t a word that Tony had ever associated with Loki before, but… Loki really was afraid—

Afraid of _losing Tony._

And finally, for the first time since he’d realised what he had started to feel, Tony found his footing.

“You told me not to fall in love with you,” he echoed, causing Loki’s gaze to snap back up to his– but even as Loki’s expression twisted into hurt, Tony smiled and added, “I’ve actually never been very good at following instructions.”

It took a moment—

But then Loki’s lips broke into a devastating smile, and he lurched forward to press them to Tony’s in a crushing, but _loving_ kiss—

And as Tony clutched him close and kissed him back, he didn’t think that he had ever felt such pure, unadulterated joy.


End file.
